Why we're here...

Apathy sets in when you are running on autopilot. What's the point of being present and aware when the things you've always told yourself you wanted have set a monotonous schedule that you can now accomplish with your eyes and heart closed, if necessary.

One day, you wake up and you realize that something is missing. Your celebrations for reached goals and milestones only temporarily replace this increasingly confusing longing or feeling of lack you're experiencing. The thing is, like people who want to protect and support us, when we get too far from our divine, she calls. This could manifest in feelings of increasing dissatisfaction when you think you should be satisfied, anxiety, depression, irritability, isolation, and feeling "stuck" and confused. Something is screaming "come find me" and after a while, it gets too loud to ignore.

I remember describing this part of my journey to a friend as it being comparable to being pushed against a glass ceiling. The sun still kept me warm through the glass and I tried to take time to admire it when I wasn't sulking about my inability to reach the other side. I knew there was more and that a shift was necessary, but because I didn't know how to access or initiate it, I went through countless cycles of pretending and mentally pouting.

Until one day, I decided to do a deep dive into my inner world. In my book, "But Sis You're Powerful: A Loving Reminder of Your Worth". I referred to it as taking a seat beside yourself. In other words, taking time to truly see and understand the woman I was without any outside voices, expectations, standards, or pressure. My journey taught me the true power of nurturing my relationship with myself. On that journey I also decided to go to therapy where I learned that many women of color find themselves disconnected from their authentic identities as women due to societal standards, community conditions, and cultural programming that all point to hyper physical femininity and a diminished mental and emotional femininity. This means, the narrative we grew up with consisted of hypersexuality and physical aesthetics while lacking the types of safe places and support systems that encouraged us to feel and express our feelings, that it's okay be nurturing and understanding, messages that told us we were valuable, and increased our belief that we deserved to be protected and receive all we desire.

For centuries, we have been on a mission to prove we are just as valuable. Imagine what centuries of fighting to make people see you does to your mindset. Not only your mindset, but the mindset of your ancestors. We were taught that we have to work that much harder and be that much smarter. We were taught to not look like what we are going through. And we have followed those directions to realize a world that has women in high government positions and on Forbes lists. Unfortunately, we were not taught how to remain connected to our most authentic divine feminine as we manifest these changes to create these opportunities and possibilities. It is possible that the disconnect is generational and given to us as protection by our ancestors who tucked their femininity away for fear of provoking brutal attacks from men she would never give permission to touch her? Or maybe it was their way to instill financial stability in the generations of daughters to come because they only stayed due to their financial dependency on men they never loved. Absolutely possible.

While these ideals may have been instilled out of love, and while they were clearly beneficial in certain areas of our lives, they are prospering at the detriment of equally important parts of ourselves that no longer have to be repressed but are still being oppressed. Parts of our femininity that when combined with the strength, determination, and resourcefulness gifted by our ancestors, produce the type of power that calls forth transformation. The type of power that encourages growth.

That's the power we realize individually and together in the "Her Inner World" Community.