Vulnerability

Amid a world demanding strength and independence, Black women emerged as warriors, bearing immense responsibilities and breaking unimaginable barriers. Unfortunately, their stories rarely encouraged vulnerability and softness, deeming it a weakness and the easiest way to be hurt and mistreated. Today, we reshape the narrative, celebrating vulnerability as a potent force of authenticity and healing for Black women.

Breaking Free from the Chains of Trauma Induced Independence:

A somewhat confusing feeling of rebellion creeps in when I think of releasing the ideology surrounding my independence as a Black Woman. For generations, we have had to protect ourselves from a world that often failed to safeguard our interests. We've had to prepare to be overlooked, underestimated, and misunderstood which ultimately gave us the mentality that we must stand alone. While this learned independence has been the foundation of our overcoming, it also inadvertently reinforced the belief that we cannot depend on others to support and protect us although many of us long for support and protection. Therefore, our independence, while productive, is a response to unique trauma we have been subjected to in the form of abandonment, poverty, limited resources. and an imbalance of power. There's absolutely nothing wrong with being self-sufficient the "wrong" is in the reasoning. The money you get from robbing a bank may change your life but there's a better way to get that money. Likewise, there's a better way to support your independence than to carry around narratives that make you take on the world alone due to anxiety and fear. Your stories are valid. Your scars are real. And now, it's time to heal.

Challenging the Narratives:

These same narratives often portrayed Black Women as unyielding pillars of strength, rarely allowing for moments of vulnerability. Most of the stories told made us "angry" and "bitter" but never hurt or wounded. They all seem to overlook our experiences and our multifaceted nature, denying us the space to express our true emotions, fears, and pains openly. By challenging these outdated portrayals, Black women are rewriting their stories with grace and embracing vulnerability as a catalyst for personal growth and inner strength. We are no longer "angry Black Women" we are HEALING Black Women. We're releasing the need to prove all that's been consitently proven about our abilities to people who are refusing to see and we are creating the types of lives we want regardless of who thinks we deserve them. This type of shift takes a level of self-intimacy that can only be obtained through honesty and vulnerability. It's time to show the world how strong we really are and of course....we're up to the task.

Finding the Courage in Vulnerability:

It takes immense strength to peel away the layers of self-protection and reveal your authentic self to the world. Our layers are perceived lessons that we tote around in an effort to avoid forgetting and therefore reliving the pain. Because it seems safer under there, we learn to live our lives from under the layers. Yet, beneath these layers lies our genuine essence, our raw emotions, and our unique identities. Embracing vulnerability allows us to not only connect more intimately with ourselves, but with other people as well. Connecting to people genuinely becomes less of a threat when it becomes more of habit. Eventually, you will realize that how people receive and reciprocate has more to do with them than it could ever have to do with you.

Building & Joining Supportive Communities:

In a world that can still be unforgiving, fostering supportive communities is crucial for Black women seeking to embrace vulnerability. Creating safe spaces where vulnerability is encouraged and celebrated can facilitate profound healing and promote genuine connections among individuals who share similar experiences.

What most people don't talk about is the discomfort and uncertainty you feel when you're healing. Taking the risk to reveal our vulnerabilities might appear like a b*%^ move at first. Fear of judgment and rejection is thing no matter who you are. However, as we persist on this transformative journey, we uncover a remarkable truth. Gradually, authenticity becomes second nature, and we find ourselves immersed in a life of ease and fulfillment. We learn to be present, embracing our true selves without reservation. Surrounded by those who love and cherish us for that authenticity. Waking up to lives that fit us like a glove. In this newfound state of being, we are liberated, experiencing life's richness in ways most of us could never have imagined. Because before you can imagine a life that speaks to the highest version of you, you have to pull back the layers and unlearn the lesson necessary to find her.

And you will.